Dear Daughter,
One thing I wish I would have found earlier in my career is a mentor. A mentor to provide advice and guidance as I grew in my career. Someone outside my current job that I could bounce ideas with. As you start college this fall, this is something you should think about sooner than later. You should find someone who has experience in your chosen field. Not only is it good to get career advice from a mentor, but it will also often lead to valuable connections.
I think a mentor can absolutely provide valuable advice based on their experience in a specific field, but as I’ve been managing and coaching people lately I’ve noticed that it’s sometimes difficult for people to accept feedback or guidance (as a person who analyzes everything and basically uses biohacking to optimize my life and soul, I have a difficult time understanding why people are so afraid of accepting feedback but that is a conversation for another day), which made me think about other ways to push and enable people to grow in their career. After some brainstorming with myself (always a fascinating process) I came up with my Challenger approach.
A Challenger is a person who will push you to view situations from a new perspective and push for bigger thinking by asking challenging questions. A Challenger will question your approach or solutions to make you step out of your comfort zone and see things from a new perspective. By analyzing a situation or your behavior you will discover patterns or habits that can be adjusted, and that way help you grow as a leader.
So what is the difference between a mentor and a challenger? A mentor (and a manager) guides a mentee by sharing information about his or her own career path, motivating and providing emotional support. A mentor may help with exploring careers, setting goals, providing feedback, developing contacts, and identifying resources. A Challenger push a person to view situations from a new perspective and push for bigger thinking in order to help them grow in their career and as leaders.
Another benefit to get a Challenger is that sometimes it’s difficult to accept advice from a manager or mentor who might not know all your capabilities, skillset or what you’ve accomplished in your career. A Challenger will only focus on your current situation to help you determine the best approach. It is easier to accept feedback from someone you’ve asked to challenge you. You welcome their questions, and you want them to push you to the max. A Challenger who won’t sugar coat it for you because they need to be mindful of your relationship. Their job is to challenge you and your thinking.
As I came up with this approach I had to think about what makes a good challenger. It is someone who is used to analyzing situations and knows how to look at a situation from different perspectives. Someone who knows the 5 Why’s and will push your thinking to come up with the real cause and new ideas. Someone who will ask the right questions to help you see a situation in a new light.
A Challenger doesn’t have to be someone in your field, in fact it’s good to find a Challenger with a different skill-set from you. In other words, someone who will have a completely new perspective. We shouldn’t be afraid of being challenged since it will push us to grow, and constantly push new thinking.
I think for you Elsa, who is just starting college, it might not be bad to get both a mentor and a challenger. Feedback is a gift since it helps us grow in our career.
Love, Mamma
